gifts and abilities

i've been thinking a lot recently about my spiritual gifts as well as abilities and talents i've developed or been given. and i've come to one major conclusion.
i don't use them well.
actually, i do have the ability to read very quickly, and i do use that to read a lot of books about raising children, being a wife, as well as fun best-sellers so that i'm up on the latest trends. but other than that...
one thing i've really been noticing recently is this ability i have to understand what a person is saying. now i know that's sort of the point of communication, but actually a lot of people aren't that good at it. for me, i can pretty well understand people who speak with different accents as well as extracting the meaning out of what a person is saying who maybe doesn't always put it clearly. i've been wondering recently, what do i do with that? right now, it helps me understand my son and that's enough for me. but i wonder how else i might use it. maybe some sort of mediating or something. i hope someday i find something or start doing something and, all of a sudden, am struck with the understanding that THIS is why i've always been good at understanding.
the other thing i don't use is a spiritual gift of counseling. the reason is that i'm scared to say hard things to people. often i'll think of things that someone needs to hear/work on but unless it's a nice thing, im too afraid of hurting someone's feelings or not being liked. it's totally wrong of me and i know it. so it's something i'm trying to work on, but still opportunities go by...