Friday, July 31, 2009

don't ask me how i'm doing

when i'm asked how these last couple of weeks of pregnancy are going, i typically say something like "i've been better" or "i'm hangin' in there". i guess both of them are true, but i'm mostly just saying them to avoid an emotional melt down in public.
i'm in so much pain, i can't even begin to explain it. i know that the last few weeks of any pregnancy are full of discomfort and pain, but i'm pretty sure this is outside the range of normal. some women (me included during my last pregnancy) try walking to stimulate labor. i can't even get in and out of bed without help. some go through a wonderful nesting period in preparation for their little one. i can't even make it from one room to another in our little condo without stopping for support. it's getting worse and worse. yesterday, i couldn't even leave my house because a) i couldn't make it down three flights of stairs and b) i can't move my legs well enough to drive.
i think i've been trying to just play it off as pregnancy pain and trying to be strong. but today i started doing a bit of research and i'm starting to think i may have a broken or bruised coccyx. that would explain a lot... the horrible pain, the difficulty moving, the intense swelling, etc. i might be wrong, but i just have to find some reason (other than 9 months of pregnancy) for this pain i'm feeling, or i'm not sure how i'll ever work up the nerve to do this again!
thank you to all the people who have stepped up to help me out with caleb or around the house. thank you for all of you who are praying for me and for Alia to come soon. and please, don't ask me how i'm doing, just know that answer is "horribly" and i'm not sure when it will change.

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